Utter Exhaustion, ever present NAUSEA, and a Precious Bulging Belly

I have sat down at this computer so many times in the last few weeks to try to put to words what this experience has been like. To keep forever in written words, memories of this incredible gift God has given us. Unfortunately, extreme exhaustion and constant nausea generally get in my way - I can hardly hold my eyes open at the end of the day to type, and watching the letters pop up across the screen as I type them, makes me dizzy and nearly makes me loose what little food I have been able to eat that day. Fortunately, I purchased this at the beginning of our pregnancy:

I have kept up with entries each day. I can't wait to look back on this account years from now, maybe even with the little sweet pea these writings are about! I highly recommend this book for anyone who is expecting, or even has an early gift for a newly expectant friend. It is hilarious, and provides some much needed laughs each day. Also, it only has a few lines for you to fill in each day. I tend to be a bit wordy at times. I will more then fill however much space provided for writing. The limited lines keep my ramblings brief and concise, and isn't overwhelming, even during my most extreme pregnancy exhausted moments. Of course, I also purchased the companion book, Girlfriend's Guide to Pregnancy.

Overall, I am very thankful for where I have fallen on the the dreaded first trimester symptoms spectrum - it really could be MUCH worse! I never knew one could feel so tired - as soon as breakfast is over, I could go back to bed for a 3-4 hour nap. Driving to work in the morning, I fight falling back to sleep. I have been known to take cat naps during my lunch break. I come home from work, eat a few bites, and fall asleep for 2-3 hours, wake up, eat a few bites more, and go back to bed for the night. My poor husband has become more familiar with my eyelids then my eyes lately.:)

On the food front, I have probably eaten meat a total of once week since I got pregnant. And by meat, I mean pieces of diced chicken. I used to eat chicken daily. Not sure what has happened, but I have horrible meat aversions right now. Which has made getting adequate protein really difficult. Luckily, I am still able to drink my Shakeology every morning. Interesting side note: in the Shakeology world/family there is a going theory - if you can drink the chocolate shake during your pregnancy, its a girl. If you can't, and have to switch to greenberry, its a boy. I have been chocolate all the way... we will see if I keep with the theory, or debunk it!:)

I have only thrown up a hand full of times, but remain on the verge the majority of the time. I would love to say I am one of the precious expectant mama's that says "but even when I throw up I have the biggest smile on my face, cause I know its just another sign of this beautiful gift God has given us..." Yeah, definitely not this girl, as evidenced this story. However, I do say a prayer of thanksgiving afterwards... once I get myself cleaned up and calmed down.:)

And it is not just meat I have aversions to, its food in general. I have lived off of applesauce and honey nut cheerios - seriously! I took this picture at the pool recently, titled "a Pregnant Girl's Pool Survival Kit"

Because of this somewhat lacking proper nutrition intake, I feel awful by the end of the day. Its a toss up - eat adequate/proper nutrition and throw up all day, or eat minimal, somewhat empty calories, feel terrible, but not throw up. I choose not to throw up every time! Which generally mean, this is what I have looked like many nights:) I haven't gained a pound so far, in fact, I am pretty sure I lost ~5 lbs, but I am not worried! I have no doubt I will pack on the pounds later!:-/ I think the weight loss has more to do with the extra pounds fertility meds love to hand you! Ugh

picture courtesy of my husband, sent to my mom

As not so pleasant as all that sounds, let me tell you about my precious, pooching-out belly - I LOVE it! I literally starting showing at 3 weeks! It just looked like a peach-sized protrusion just below my belly button. It has steadily grown since then. However, I am just now starting to look like I might be pregnant, and not just pudgy, based on what I wear. I love feeling, rubbing, patting, or just placing my hand on my belly, and knowing our little sweat pea is safely nestled inside me, growing like a weed. There is nothing else like it! Lately, the Baby Daddy has taken to resting his hand on my belly too, while we watch tv, are falling asleep at night, driving in the car, etc... I guess I can share some hand space on my belly.:) Here is glimpse at the belly bulging, from week 2, until now.:)

sorry about the poor quality. I have an archaic camera phone:)

I enter my 2nd trimester tomorrow! I can not believe we have made it this far, and this quickly! 1/3 of the way there!!!! Jared and I keep saying we don't want to jinx it, but this last 2-3 days, I have been a little bit closer to my usual self. I have been able to eat at least one normal meal a day, haven't napped nearly as much, seem a bit more energetic, etc... Maybe that incredible 2nd trimester energy everyone keeps telling me about is about to come my way???

There is so much more I want to share about what this pregnancy has done to/for me spiritually, emotionally, relationally, how it has affected my marriage, etc... but I am not back to that level of cognition yet (I swear I lost the entire half of my brain cells, you supposedly loose during pregnancy, by week 3... it ain't been pretty!) It still seems somewhat surreal. However, I am no longer walking around on pins and needles, waiting for the "bomb/other shoe to drop."

Until the the next wave of energy! For now, I am off for my morning nap! It is the weekend after all - time to catch up on some rest!:)