Monday, September 16, 2013

Lessons learned from my pandora bracelet

I have my own semi-unique sense of style. I can go for super trendy, to way out dated, to simple-timeless-classic all in one outfit. I generally have some sort of pearls on (primarily in the form of earrings) hence the name of this blog. My husband could wear polo and j.crew for every outfit of every day. I love me some j.crew looks, just not the price! I have tried to look that part before... It just isn't me. I blame the crazy frizzy-curly hair (the other half of the reason for the name of this blog.) I like to think of my type of style as bohemian-chic.

Even with a rather wide range eclectic style, I still have very set likes and dislikes when it comes to my clothing and accessories. And apparently that of my daughter's as well. For instance, I buy 97% of Ellie Faith's clothes at those obnoxiously large seasonal consignment sales. I usually hit up two a season. And yes, it takes me hours, but its saves us!!!! Anyway, I have had several people offer to go with me to help navigate the racks, fight the crowds, etc... The very thought of accepting this simple act of kindness stresses me out to no end.

Yes, I realize this is ridiculous and might be piece of evidence 145,273,364 that I could possibly benefit from counseling at some point.

What if they pick out something I don't like?!? I realize there is a very good chance that I would veto every single item they picked out ... What type of awful human does this make me?!?

Speaking of consignment... Due to our kinda more crazy than usual summer schedule, I am not able to make my main sales for fall/winter clothing. Therefor I am planning my next trip back to visit my family around the time of a large consignment sale in their area. I am now trying to decide if I should post this before or after that time, as I know my mom will want to go help me. And I honestly, will love having her there with me, as it will be a first for us. Not sure if preparing her ahead of time for her daughter's neurosis would be better, or if would cause her undue stress and anxiety with each outfit she holds up for my appraisal. We shall see....

Apparently, this should have been titled along the lines of "hi my name is Amy, and I am a consigning and fashion control freak.... But definitely not fashion blogger! Seems I have lost my ability to title posts as well as maintain any level of flow or thought/subject consistency.

Back to pandora - the reason for the tittle of this post...

My sweet husband got me a pandora bracelet for my past birthday (my 30th if you must know.) but only after he was adequately convinced I would love it, as he is all too familiar with the strength my crazy likes and dislikes. I truly love it and know it will be a cherished piece of mine forever.

He started with just a charm of my birthstone - a topaz. Which by the way, as a child I was convinced was the ugliest the birthstone known to man. However, with maturity, and the increasing popularity of the yellow diamond, my appreciation for the topaz is grown exponentially.

For Christmas we went to the pandora store together to pick out my next charm - in memory of the baby we lost in October. ( Jared already said he planned on getting me a charm for Ellie on her birthday... Didn't happen until Mother's Day ... But even though I am clearly neurotic, I am totally ok with that). We picked out a sliver charm that had roses and leaves on it - two things that will always remind me of our October baby. The leaves were just changing colors and falling to the ground when we learned our baby got to meet Jesus first. I also received a gorgeous bouquet of flowers from the CSF with some of the biggest roses I have ever seen. 

As we were leaving the store, I told Jared I did not want any of the dangling charms, ever! I love big dangling earrings (when I am not earring my pearl studs) but dangling bracelets charms just were not me!

Y'all, as I am writing this I am amazed anyone ever attempts to buy me anything - there is just not consistency to my likes and dislikes!

For Christmas that year I received three different charms from three different people: a baby girl dress (in honor of Ellie from my SIL), a charm of the Italian Coliseum ( in honor of my Italian heritage from my MIL, who majored in Italian) and a daisy and pearl combo charm (in honor of two of my favorite things from my baby sister.) Oh, and in case you needed to be told - they were all dangling! I think Jared paled a bit each time I opened the next one.

I loved each one of them instantly because of the thought put into each purchase by people that are some of the dearest to me. But in full disclosure, yes, my chest tightened up a little at the thought of my nice uniform bracelet becoming not so uniform and predictable. Apparently my clothes can span the spectrum of style, but my accessories can't... Or at least my bracelets.

But here is the deal. I put the charms on, and never looked back. I love them. Each and every one of them. I would be heart broken to loose any one of those dangling charms. Those three dangling charms taught me a lesson that I really needed/need to take to heart. I think a lot of us (women especially) do.

While yes, I probably know myself better then most people know me, other people see me in a way I don't see myself. And maybe even more shocking - their perspective can be just as true and valid as my perspective ... Maybe even more so at times.

Wives, how many times has your husband looked at your when you are an absolute mess (or whale-ishly pregnant) and told you how darling you look? Daughters, how many times have your parents told you were beautiful when you knew just knew you were having a "fat day and a bad hair day?!?" Or your coworkers or boss complimented you on a job well done and you just shrugged it off as you were just doing your job. What about the friend who tells you how much an act or conversation on your part meant to them, and you just think you were in the right-place-right-time? The list could go on and on... And yes the are times when we look horrendous, but our husbands and family members choose to look past simply the outward and see through to the real you. There are times when you were simply doing a good job because it was the right thing to do. And as much as we would all love to be that friend that always knows just what to say or do, the majority of the time, we probably have just been placed in the right-time-right-place setting without knowing it. 

The people in our lives see us vastly different then we see ourselves. They often see our talents and faults better then we ourselves see them, but still love and accept us. Even celebrate us. It's good to be reminded that the same mirror through which we see ourselves, often provides a different reflection from what others see when they look at us. For better and worse. 

This has also taught  me that I might need to get outside my comforts zone more, fashionably speaking and otherwise. And get to know the "Amy" others see when they look at me.

Nothing too crazy of course. I mean I would love to look like I stepped out of an Anne Taylor or J. Crew  catalog (with pieces bought via consignment of course) but comfort zone or not, as much as I love that look, it's just not me. Now some Tory Burch Rivas or Frye boots.... Yeah, I could definitely give those a try no problem!


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