Better than a Hallelujah

I am loving one of Amy Grant's new songs, Better Than a Hallelujah. Growing up, Amy Grant was one of my favorite childhood music artists. I mean, for a kid it doesn't get much better then Grape, Grape Joy. Tennessee Christmas will forever be another favorite. I was born (and raised) in Nashville, Tn right around the time Amy Grant exploded onto the Christian music scene. I remember getting asked all the time as kid if I was named after her. Another interesting, and completely unrelated side note - ET was picture of the year when I was born. I was born with ridiculously long skinny fingers (I wear a 3.5-4 ring size, can reach a 12th on the piano, and palm a women's basketball. And yes, I am only 5'3".) My brown eyes are the same size now as they were when I was born. It wasn't until around my 11th or 12th birthday that I realized that my dad did not in fact carry around a picture of ET telling people it was my baby picture, as I had been previously told.


Back to the real meaning of this post. I love the honesty in this song:

We pour out our miseries
God just hears a melody
Beautiful, the mess we are
The honest cries of breaking hearts
Are better than a Hallelujah

The silence when the words won't come
Are better than a Hallelujah sometimes

To me, it is such a beautiful reminder of what an incredibly kind, merciful, loving, and compassionate Lord I serve. He loves to hear me pour out my misery, to hear my cries when the words won't come, better then me singing praises... sometimes. I think a lot of Christians get mistakenly hung up on this fact/gift, and abuse grace far too often. The Fruits of the Spirit are Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self Control, after all. Our song of life should not always be "gloom and doom/woe is me." However, our gracious Heavenly Father allows us, in our humanness, to pour out our hearts to Him, so He can share our sorrows, sufferings, and burdens. I need to be reminded of this - I need to be weak, broken, and humbled in His Presence. 

For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

2 Corinthians 12:10

Too often I tend to attempt to be strong on my own, sometimes to the point of preventing the Arms of my Heavenly Father carrying me as far as He would desire.

This song holds another special meaning for me - the word Hallelujah. I love this word, and always have. I love the Hallelujah Chorus. Hallelujah just sounds so majestic, angelic, powerful, gorgeous, glorious, etc...  There is another "Hallelujah Song" I love -  Julianne Hough's - My Hallelujah Song! If you don't like this song... well, I might consider still being your friend, but I will never see you in the same light. :)

When people know you are wanting to start a family, naturally one of the questions that is often asked is "So have you discussed names?" The answer is, yes we have, in great detail. We have a list that we have compiled and edited over the last few years. Unfortunately, the hubs and I do not agree on name styles. I love good ol' Nashville names, a few southern bred names, double/hyphenated names, and names that would definitely be considered "Fringe/alternative." Jared likes plain, boring, simple - John and Caroline are as exciting as it gets. And I adore both of these names, but so does the majority of the population! I want unique, individualistic, and memorable. Because of this major road block, I don't think (or try not to) think of our future children with my favorite names... I am weird about mental and emotional associations, especially names. Hello schizo, nice to meet you again.... I have had a girl's name picked out for ~ 10 years, and my heart is set on it... but we will fight that battle when we get there. One thing that is the greatest strength in my relationship with my husband, has always been our ability to compromise. So I am not worried. But I needed some sort of name for when I pray for our future children, etc.... And then it came to me a few months ago - my Hallelujah Babies. It doesn't matter their gender, their biologic beginnings, their ethnicity, etc... if they become our children, they will be our Hallelujah Babies. The babies we have longed and begged the Lord for. The babies that we will daily rejoice and praise for the Lord for. They will be a constant reminder His loving kindness and faithfulness. They will be our constant Hallelujah!

For this child I have prayed....

1 Samuel 1:27