Monday, December 31, 2012

Farewell 2012, Hello 2013

its amazing the difference a year can make

I had grand visions and plans of writing one of those deeply reflective and emotionally stirring posts that real bloggers always seem to write on/around New Years... instead, I am pecking this out on my iPhone, from a sick bed. Jared and I have been down and out for the past 48 hours... He still isn't convinced it isn't some life threatening disease. I have no such concerns, but am equally miserable.

Today I tweeted:
There should be a law of nature that both parents can never be sick at the same time... Unless you deserve a special level of hell.
To make matters worse, we got sick while out of town visiting my family and friends... and had to travel back home sick as dogs. So of course, I had to let the social media world know of my miseries:
Being sick is never fun... Traveling sick is miserable... Being sick as a mom, brings being sick to a whole new level!! #whydidileavemymom
So, no this post isn't going to be well thought out and pristinely written, with deep insights and spiritual inspirations... just a sick mom's musings.

2012 saw me become a mom, and my husband become a dad.


As odd as it may sound, it wasn't earth shattering, and I didn't feel the earth shift on its axis, like many people tell it, when speaking of becoming parents. For me, it was like Ellie Faith as always been a part of our life, and I couldn't remember what it was like without her. I would describe it as complete. Now I will say the experience of becoming a parent was slightly different for Jared.

Bear with me moms/parents who are wanting to throw something through their computer screen...

I believe this was the case for several reasons. Our experience with infertility, and my subsequent high risk pregnancy and bed rest left us just so incredibly grateful to not only have a baby, but a healthy baby.

She also happened to be one of the easiest babies ever! Put herself on an every three hour feeding schedule from birth, and was sleeping 8+ hours a night by week 7. Not your typical newborn experience.

I also think the fact that for years I had taken care of 2-3 babies at a time, status post open heart surgery or transplant made another difference. One healthy baby is (can be) a piece of cake.

Jared and I often looked at each other and say,"are we really parents? Is this precious kid really ours to keep?"

Well, that whole "holy crap we really are parents!" feeling has started to sink in for us in the past 6 weeks or so.

Why just now? Well, Ellie Faith, our sweet, precious, easy going girl has discovered her own (very strong) opinions and self will. So basically, for the first time we are really consistently/routinely pushed outside our comfort zone and tested by our daughter.

I am not surprised by this, and was in fact, expecting it.

I am a baby lover. I can hold even a strangers baby for hours. If I am anything like my mom, I will be loving babies just as much when my own grandbabies are being born.

I am also extremely independent, strong willed, and structured. Babies, are easy (or Ellie was for me) to fit into your life, and your schedule. Toddlers... not so much. We are starting to get our first taste of what it means for our lives to be way more influenced by Ellie Faith's emotions of the moment.

I have a feeling I will fall into the minority of moms who love the first 10 months with their baby, and endure (with lots of love) years 1-3!

And for all you "experienced" parents out there laughing that I think years 1-3 will be bad, and just wait for ages 10-22... I am as well aware as I can be from my point in my journey of parenthood of the challenges ahead. However, I am choosing/trying to keep in step with what my mom's wise words:
"Don't Future Trip"
2012, you have a great year  - one of the best to date. You saw us welcome our daughter with eager anticipation, open arms, and hearts bursting with love.

2012 saw us learn to became a family - a daddy, mommy, and baby girl. It also saw us release another baby back into the arms of Jesus.

2013, I think (hope and pray) you will see us become parents.
Here is a quick preview of our first Christmas as a family  of three!

And because my life isn't miserable enough right now... my blogger app erased this post just as I was publishing... so I ended up slamming out an even more choppy, short, and segmented post then planned  ... on the computer.

Happy New Year everyone! 

.... I need IV advil and tylenol stat!

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